Thursday, March 28


I have lived for so long now with the presure over my heart and the uncertanty over when my next anciety will attack will show up, that I now don't even now how do deal with prefection.

With perfection I mean waking up and everything feels great, going for a run that also feels awsome, having breakfast good even that. My whole body feels like its in euphoria mode.

Yes Spring is finally here it is Euphoria!!

But what do I do? I start to look forthe signs, what is wrong, isn't there somedark cloud howering in the horizon of my mind. There must be something it feels wrong.

Nothing has happened for me to feel like this I should feel the misery, the panic, the anciety.

Not Happy and Calm!

Or hang on that is Exactly how I should feel and what I feel right here right now!!

Stop and enjoy it god damn it!!